i think thats  a  good idea talking to the cab .... at least they will be able to negotiate maybe better with your creditors and arrange payments to them instead of maybe the debt management firm you are under ...dont know which if its the same with  yours  but when i enquired they wanted to take so much commision/service charge for themselves each month ...meaning less was going to pay off the debts ....i went through cab and they have been great ...and only one of my creditors is being a pain in the a** (littlewoods)  wit not accepting reduced payments and that is the one i owed least to ....

ive not had any problems with gp since ive been with them, i get a statment every months telling me what they have paid, maybe i will ring my creditors up and ask how much they are really getting. i did try and ring up and sort it ut my self, but never got any were, i will go to cab next week and have a chat with them. thanks for all your replys, he is home now, slighty p***ed, but he might just pass out like normal lol. hey ho any day.

Hi I agree with what Clairelous said about debt management companies coz I haven't had a good experience with them in the past either, and I ended up contacting the companies or debt collectors myself and arranged with them what I could afford pay due to my circumstances and household income..

It was lovely of your parents to give you a holiday, take that time so that you and dh can really have a good heart to heart.

I think today was a way of finding an argument with me, because he is really mad at me for being in a mood today, I just dont know what to do anymore, we have had a real tuff year so far, and yes i havent been the most easyest person to live with, but i cant help the way i feel.

Ive not long been back from my parents house, and he has just walked out to the pub, because he dont want to be here! So there gose more money that we havent got, but then thats up to him,  if my leckie gose off and he spent all the money god help him lol.

I think it sounds like you deserve a holiday hun and if your parents have paid for it then i cant see a problem with it. I sympathise with how your DH is though as my DP is just the same, ive been asking him for the nursery fees for DD for 3 weeks now and still waiting (me and his mum have paid them, but he doesn't know this) his mum has just paid almost £600 in bills for us and he still sits there ignoring whats happening around us. He ignored letters from bank saying his account was over drawn and in the end i rang the number and forced the phone in his hand, he owed £368 in charges alone and was furious with me!!!! Said he was leaving me blah blah blah when its his account not mine and i wasn't hte one who ignored the letters etc. IMO men are useless and it sounds like you do all the financial stuff like i have do ours as he is a waste of space.

I really hope you manage to sort things out soon, it sounds like you deserve it xxx

Best advice I can give you is leave Gregory Pennington.   We got into debt about 10 yrs ago and went with that company and thought we were okay with the them till i had a letter from one of the companies we owed saying they never got the money that month.   I rang them and found out that gregory pennington were only paying them £5 a month want would have taken years to pay off.   They were paying the minimum amoun to the companies and taking the rest for them selves.  Long and short is I contacted the companies myself in the end and worked out a more realistic payment plan and paid them off.

Ahh hun I'm sorry you've had such a rough couple of years and what lovely parents to give you the break you need.

It sounds to me like you just want sum support from your DP so that all the finance worries aren't on your shoulders.  I know the feeling as I deal with the money at home and sometimes I'd like to be oblivious to it all like my DF.   Is your DP just burying his head in the sand hoping the problems will go away or does he not take enough notice to know its serious.  Can you write all your incomings and outgoings down nice and simple and sit down and show him it in black and white?

Sorry I can't really help just didn't wanna read and run!

The holiday was paid for by my parents its an all inclusive holiday, it was for me and dh to have some time together after lsing Our little girl, My nan has also given us some money.

I contacted a debt management company Gregory pennington, and got all the debts sorted out, and have the one payment coming out for all our debts, but he just dosnt seem to care about it, Yes the bills our in my name because he never botherd to srt things out on the days when he was at home, things that do come in, in his name, he will openen them and just put it in the bin, or leave it on the side and not do anything about it. Insted or sitting down with me and working things out, he just says you know what your doing, Number of times, i have sat at the table with all the paper work out and he has sat watching the football or somthing.

Things are not as bad as they were, just today when he thought we had more money than we did, but we didnt, and i didnt understand why the 2 payments went out, i cleared it all up, i was/am still just in a bad mood, and now he having a go at me because i went into town in a bad mood. Just want a bit of help from him with things like this. Thi gs are hard as they are without him having a go at me, or thinking about the debt.

I understand what your saying abut not going on holiday if we are in debt, lucky for us i have very nice parents/family, and mum and dad have helped us out alot in the past years, as they have not been very good. 2 prem births, car accident, and Losing Lola last year, this is were all the debt has stemed from, as we have had to tae loads of time off work for being in hospital. Im not blaming him, i just feel he dosnt give me the time of day when it comes to sorting out money.

If things are really as bad as you say you wouldn't be going on holiday you'd be clearing your debts and sorting yourself out. It desn't sound as if you're communicating with one another so perhaps you need to sit down show him exactly what is owed and forget about your holiday .

Dont understand why when you are in so much debt you are going on holiday. That money would have been better spent paying off existing debts. But each to their own I suppose.

Maybe he doesn't seem to care because it is all in your name, and he probably thinks it is not that bad considering you are going on holiday. lol.

Dont understand though why your dh is gona get it when he gets home. You are the one with all the debts. You are the one dealing with the debt management company. It is them that took more money than agreed.

Ditto to all other comments on the unnecessary expense of a holiday.

thats what i was going to say holidays cost alot of money with all the going out and the flights etc... if your so worried about debt wouldnt you rather use the holiday money to pay some of it off? im not being nasty i just dont understand! x

did you contact the debt management place that takes the money out you account dont think they are allowed to take anymore than agreed without contacting you,,,,if it happens again id cancel DD and sent checque from now on

with the regards to the holiday ...if you are in so much debt do you really need it ..can you not wait until your finances are in a better position

hope you get it sorted out

Dh has really pi$$ed me off today.

Its started because we are in debt, and we are with  debt management program, but today they just messed things up and took more money than they should of etc, and i really got upset and that made me in a mood, well i want to  just have it all paid off and forget about it, but i cant.

Dh changed his jobs now on a cap wage, but is now 9-5 not 3am till what every time lol.

But when i told him i was pi$$ed of, he just said Oh don't worry about it!! HUH, he just dont care, He dont know what we owe or who we owe, if i wasnt for me going to  a debt management we would prob have nothing left in the house, which in a way i wish they did come take it all and then he might just open his eyes and relise that i need his help, Im megar stressed out andalso trying to cope with losing are little girl, i dont need him just taking the back seat all the time,  he is more worried about how clean the house is, i would rather live in a mess than have debt, Thing is when im at home, i get all the calls and people knocking at the door, not him, 99% of the stuff is in my name, because he never sorts anything out.

ARRGGGHHH he has really pi$$ed me off, and today when i went into town to get some passport pictures done, every place i went to was out of order, so i just said oh dont think this holiday was ment to be, and he just said f^ck sake, im going back to work, and walked off from me.

I really hate him at the moment again.

Sorry rant over. FEWWWW