Thanks for your words

Not playing the hero here but the fault lies with me.I failed to protect my wife from the pressures of life at a time when she was clearly hurting in ways I didnt realise.

That is my fault and no one elses and I'm jst sorry I failed her.

With respect to my daughter then i think you may be right.she's got a pretty good head on her sholders.No there's been no real contact since,I think my daughter may have sent her a message that was one of a hurting child but not really something that helped either of them as i think it's probably caused some bad feeling on both sides

my concern now is will my daughter ever trust another woman again......every one who has been in her life has,in her view gone or let her down

Guess it's just a case of trying to help her keep the faith in some way

Such a dreadful situation. I've seen some of your other threads and am amazed at how understanding you have been with your wife and the things she has said and done. It must be very difficult. It certainly sounds to me like you've done everything and more to try and work out a solution.

As far as your 12 year old is concerned I think trying to explain to her that your wife is ill may help her to understand why she is being so irrational and will hopefully prevent your daughter from thinking it's anyone's fault (it sounds to me like your wife is suffering some kind of illness, even if it's just crazy pregnancy hormones or something more serious like antenatal depression). Has your wife had any contact with your 12 year old since she left?

I hope things get better for you soon!

Has anyone been through similar.

Sadly,and I won't go into the history my fantastic wife has decided to go......and in quite a spectacular way!

This isnt the first time but this time it seems to be for good.To be honest I am really worried about her and what she may be going through but she won't communicate in any real way.

When she left my 12 year old hear her talking to me about terminating and since she's been gone she's told me she is bleeding and having cramps etc but hasnt gone to the dr.

Please don't thin this is a moan about her,she's an incredibly fantastic lady but the pressure seems to have got to her and I've tried but obviously havent been what shee needed me to be.

If anyone is a better parent than me then please help me out

My 12 year old had a very abusive mum and after years of social services etc the court seems to have decided she should have no contact with her mum.Sad for them both in my opinion but there's a lot of history

All she ever wanted was a mum and a family

With my wife we thought we had just that and she thought she was going to finally have a mum and a baby brother or sister.

she now knows that has gone and mum has left and that the baby she dreamed of is possibly going to be aborted or live somewhere else.I've tried to tell her that if the baby is born we will fight for joint custody and the baby will be part of our lives but it's little comfort to her.

Can anyone tell me if they think i should be doing something more because i really just dont know