I just booked my homebirth today.  I'm due on 11 October but my mum will come up on 8 october to be with me, otherwise I'm on my own. Trouble is, midwife said I'm engaged now and will probably go early. bug ger.

hyi i dont have a problem with my birth partner as my df will be with me but we have a prob with if i do have to be transfered to hospital as we have no one to look after them.we told the midwife about this and we have told ehr they will be comeing with us as i am not having my baby on my own.so if i do have to be transfered to hospiutal eveyone is coming with me.

I'd be very happy to check out some of my colleagues near to you, if you like?

If you'd like me to, can you let me know where in SW London you are (shame you're not nearer to me, I'd do it for you!)

Wow! I didn't know about that. Will certainly check it out...

I'm in South West London anyway if that helps!

Hello, doula here!

The regulatory body, Doula uk (www.doula.org.uk) has a hardship fund - if you are at uni and you have no birthing partner then you should qualify for that certainly. It means you don't have to pay anything if you can't afford to - some people give their doula a little extra, but not everyone. We certainly don't expect it.

Also, depending on where you are, you may be able to get a trainee doula (they have still been through all the training and may well have done quite a few births). The maximum a trainee can charge is £150 - but don't let this put you off, many trainee doulas, if they are close to you, will do it for next to nothing, or free, as they are glad to get more experience.

Whereabouts are you?

Thanks.. I'll start asking around friends to see who could be emergency babysitter if it all goes wrong. Just hope there's someone around and it's not on Christmas Day or something (edd is Jan 6th)!!

I can't afford a Doula sadly, otherwise it sounds wonderful.

Just feeling a little despondent because of how awkward the baby's dad is being. In theory I have no problem with going it alone, but the practicalities where my other kids are concerned are a little worrying!

I would see if you can find a doula or similar.

Or a supportive friend?

There is no problem with you having a HB unsupported, many women do it successfully.

The only problem they may have is the childcare issue. If you have to be transferred in an ambulance, your kids can't go with you and MW are unable to take them to the hospital.

I opted for HBs for many reasons, one of the main ones was the childcare issue as had no one to watch the kids appart from DP.

Could you not call your mum as soon as you start labouring so that she can come down for the children just in case or maybe ask a friend if they would be happy to sit with the kids if you had to transfer.

They can't refuse you a HB as a lot of hospitals won't allow your children in for a hospital delivery either so HB is preferable in your situ. Your MW will be able to advise you further as you wont be the first mum without childcare to deliver a baby!

I was lucky as DP would have been able to stay with the kids if i needed to transfer and i would have birthed alone in the hospital but i also had a back up plan to ring a friend if it happened fast (had a previous BBA)

I`ve never had HB (this will be my first) but i cant see how it will make a difference. You could always get a Doula..(not sure what these are but see ppl mention them). There is one lady on here who is a doula..maybe if she sees post she may have a suggestion??

Help! I'm in a bit of a pickle...

I'm 23 + 3 with my 3rd baby and want a home birth (all ok with my midwife as long as my pregnancy stays low risk) but I'm not sure there's anyone I can ask to be birth partner.

Baby's dad is being unbelievably tw*ttish at the moment (long story!) and right now I doubt that he'll even be around. My mum lives 120 miles away so can't exactly get here at short notice - she doesn't even drive! I have no other family in the area and all my friends are relatively new uni mates, so I don't feel close enough to any of them to ask one of them to be my birth partner.

What is the policy on mums who don't have someone with them (other than the midwife!!!)? Am I more likely to be transferred to hospital or will it not make a difference? If they want to transfer me, I'm screwed because there will be literally no-one to watch my other two kids. That's the first reason I wanted a home birth in the first place!