thanks

i did get a reference number once i hit submit

might give them a call monday thansk

I applied online... they give you  reference number I think, but that is it till they start to process your claim.

They did ring me after about a week, but I think it was cus my name was showing up on my ex's old claim - was living with him for a while - on the old CSA system and they needed to delete it.

Its worth phoning them, to query where they are with it... general rule is, the more you phone the faster they work just to shut you up lol.

has anyone else applied online - do you get an acknowledgement or just sit tight for 4 weeks and wait to hear summit?

I must admit my ex was pretty good with paying me direct up until i met someone new! Then he had to meet someone new? Im sure theres logic in there somewhere!! So any money went on him going out to pull instead of dd and the stupid CSA messed up the claim so have now got to start a new one!

everyone should contact the csa the minute their ex comes out with the "i dont want them involved, i'll pay you direct" line tbh.

they only use that one, cus they know they can pon you off and they dont legally have to pay a penny. 

i wish in hindsight, i'd phoned them whilst was on the maternity ward, my ex managed to fob me off for a month,.... but that was a month too long in my eyes tbh.

(lol not a money grabber .. honest.. just saw my old dear struggle without any csa/maintenance whilst my a*** father sat pretty on his £20k per year and no mortgage, taught me never to do the same)

They are the ex for a reason, and no-one, including yourself, is obliged to do anything for them and their parents, and vice versa.

As for finances, agree with Takeachance.

I think perhaps drop him a text and ask for his NI number

obviously hell reply 'why / what for?'

and then tell him its for your dd csa application as youre sick of waiting/asking/begging/etc

hopefully hell buck up his ideas if you just threaten it?

ask him to set up a standing order or summit so it happens automatically on a certain day

as for filling in the papers saying ddd stays with him more than he actually does JUST DONT !!!!!!!

If in the future there are arguments / solicitors / courts etc he has proof that YOU have provided that he has dd overnight more than he actyually does

They are an EX for a reason

My ex had agreed to pay me every week, on his pay day, so we didnt have to go through the CSA, he hates them, I do too, so it was agreed and everything was ok.

Except, he decides to pay late, every week, its winding me up. I text him on the day he was due to pay it and had no reply, 4 days later I text him again (day before he sees kids) and said either you pay up, or I have no choice but to go to the CSA and in the meantime you have no right to see the children. He soon text back lol, and says he'll pay today, so we'll see!!!

Ultimatum time I think. Tell him the next time money is short or late you're going to CSA.

As for your birthday, hope you had a nice day, but really as an ex do you relly think he would of remembered, men aint that thoughtful. I done fathers day birthday and xmas the 1st year for my ex and he didn't bother so i stopped. So my advice there is just stop wasting your money on his family, hope that doesn't sound too harsh

Hi All.

I have posted on here before but some time ago now - hope everyone is well.

Well, my DD's Daddy & I split very early in my pregnancy & although he's still around he may aswell not be if you know what I mean.

We agreed that he would pay me directly because he doesn't want to go through the CSA so he told me what he earns & I worked it out on the calculater on the CSA website what he should pay me. We agreed that he would give me the money on or before the 10th of each month because he doesn't want to set up a standing order.

Well he's either always late or pays me short & I am sick of it because it's always me that end up struggling each month waiting for his money or having to ask my parents to help me out yet again.

Then, & I know this is me being annoyed at him but - it was my birthday Friday. When it's his birthday or his parents or Christmas or Mother's / Father's Day I make sure I do something special for him & for his Mum & Dad from our DD because that's the right thing to do for her. Anyway, Friday came & went & I didn't get a thing from them from my Daughter or from them personally which I was really really hurt about. Even when I was on maternity leave & not earning much money I still went to town on all of them. I am hurt that none of them could be bothered to even get me a card.

So I'm thinking you know what, why should I do what he wants. Why should I be messed around every month & not know when I'm getting his money. I'm wondering if I should just contact the CSA anyway. Thing is he's going to have to pay slightly more money too because when I worked it out there's a question that asks how many nights a year DD stays with him, I answered 52 - 100+something which means he gets a reduction in what he pays - actually she stays less than 52 nights a year & so shouldn't be entitled to any reduction. God why have I been so nice to him for so long. He thinks he's got me just were he wants me.

On other hand I'm not sure I can stand the arguments that I know I'll get & the bad mouthing because I've contacted CSA.

Any advice ladies???? Thanks, Leesa.xxx.