hi hun thanx for your reply my dd is only 13 so thats why im so concerned and thinks its no big deal she has self harmed b4 aswel which im gettin her help with shes been for 1 of her sessions this morn actually so i poped in 1st  and explained the new things that i have found out about it has been a ruff weekend to top things off both me and dh were pushed so far that on the friday i lost my temper that much i actually slapped her and then when i was out saturday her and my hubby had a fight and he had grabbed her which im not condoning but you can only take so much and be pushed so far that your gonna flip at some point anyway shes told the counciller this morn that her and dh had this row and he hit her now shes wanting to ring me for a chat so i no what its gonna be about and to be honest its all we need at the moment on top of everything else i feel sik with worry at the moment and this holething is reallly getting me down we are supposed to be trying for another baby aswel i had my coil removed last friday but i cant bring another baby into all of this it wouldnt be fair on all of us

hi hun thanx for your reply my dd is only 13 so thats why im so concerned and thinks its no big deal she has self harmed b4 aswel which im gettin her help with shes been for 1 of her sessions this morn actually so i poped in 1st  and explained the new things that i have found out about it has been a ruff weekend to top things off both me and dh were pushed so far that on the friday i lost my temper that much i actually slapped her and then when i was out saturday her and my hubby had a fight and he had grabbed her which im not condoning but you can only take so much and be pushed so far that your gonna flip at some point anyway shes told the counciller this morn that her and dh had this row and he hit her now shes wanting to ring me for a chat so i no what its gonna be about and to be honest its all we need at the moment on top of everything else i feel sik with worry at the moment and this holething is reallly getting me down we are supposed to be trying for another baby aswel i had my coil removed last friday but i cant bring another baby into all of this it wouldnt be fair on all of us

I have been through the teen age stuff and out the other side with SDD but not full time.

We had to deal with her stupid mum taking her to pubs with her on nights out and wondering why her 15 year old had got a 25 year old BF that got her pregnant at 16!!!!!!

The best thing you can do is accept she is going to experiment unless she is very young(12-14) and try make sure she is having safe sexual contact by providing both the pill via the doctor and condoms. You could also take her to family planning for advise by a qualified advisor for her age.

Smoking is another factor you could just show her what it is doing to her. A lot of girls her age smoke because it is supposed to keep you thin!!!!!! Also peer preasure plays a part in all this so is it that she hasn't chosen her friends well. You could take her photo around to your local shops and explain that your DD is under age and you do not want her served with cigs, depends how badly you want to ruin her street cred.

The one thing you can't do is ban her from either unless your in a possition to watch her 24/7 even at school till she's 16.

Good luck.

Emma

could really use someone whos got a dd in teenage years to talk to at the moment im just so worried about mine as shes started to experiment sexualy thinks its no big deal and wont really talk to me about it i only found out by accident shes also been smoking aswel im told it gets worse but already really worried about her