theres a bit more to it i think than what i previously explained as my daughter had been self harming she told me it was through bullyin in school and is now in a new 1 no self harming has occured since i found out so im pleased i got her into see a counsilor which i was a bit dubious about as i feel like they tend to judge and i didnt want sum1 telling us we were doing things wrong etc but if it helps my dd then so be it nehow weve had a really bad weekend as i found out dds been smoking and although shes not had sex shes been doing other things that a 13 yr old girl shud defo not be doing as far as i no its just the 1 time anyhow both me and dh loat our tempers with her this weekend on seperate occasions and im not proud to say it but i did actually slap her she pushed and pushed and id just had enough im only human at end of the day my dh also has grabbed her when ive been out after a arguement its this part shes mentioned to the counselor today and shes gonna ring me 4 a chat she sed this is all i need on top of everything else its effecting my relationship with my dh all of this stress and putting a big strain on things i just dont no what im suposed to do anymore my dd says she isnt trying to split us up as she knows id be very unhappy but it looks to me like shes trying to blame my dh for everything thats going wrong in her life just now and its just not fair this is why i feel torn in 2 i love my dd and want her to be happy and for her and my dh to get along and i also love my dh but do no he is very hard on her and tell him regulary that he needs to try harder with her arrrrrrrr!!! i could stand on my roof and scream very loudly just now

If she doesn't like him it could be a problem but your right it does just sound like normal teenager. Ask her instead of having an argument to walk away and think about things come back when she has and present a case for why she was right. Ask your DH to do the same. It produces sulky teenagers but often has results if they are normally well behaved.

Emma

im so fed up of being in the middle all the time dunno what to do dh is very hard on her at times but he says its because he cant stand the way she speaks to me she does have an attitude on her minds but apparently thats the norm when at a certain age anyway i feel like i cant go out as when i returen theyve been rowing she s***s my dh of all the time and he argues with her see i can ignore he however cant i sent them out for the day once and told then not to return til they were freinds and they acually had a good day but as soon as home its back to square 1 again dh thinks she dus it deliberetly as she wont b happy til shes drove a wedge between me and him and i ask him to leave but she says that she wouldnt do that as i would b unhappy i just want them to get along am i wanting the un acheiveable???? anyone in similar circumstances offer an ear or some advice please ive had enough x