I agree with previous posts re legal advice - most family solicitors will give you half an hour free of charge if not you may just need to bite the bullett and pay...

I went through a similar thing when my step children were 13 and 14 - as there was no formal custody arrangemnt in place and due to their age it was just a case that one stayed and one didnt (he felt obliged to stay with his Mum cos she went mental at them when they said they wanted to live with us).

Things to consider are if your partner has parental responsibility for them? If they were married when the kids were born he would do or if he has applied for it since... The law has changed now and its just down to the birth certificate but not sure what year that came in...

If they have PR at least it puts them on an even footing.

My final advice would be make sure you are being completly unbiased when you talk about her Mother and ensure you are not subconciously convincing her to stay with you.  Also try and establish why she wants to stay with you guys - no offence intended but teenagers often see their absent parent as the "nicer" option as they arnt the parent who tends to have to set the curfews and deal with all the messy problems...

Im not assuming that she doesnt want to stay with you for good reasons I just know from experience that its not always straightforward.

If you are all happy that this is the best move then I would consider contacting her Mum, explaining that she wants to stay longer and go from there - maybe just take it a week at a time so it gives her Mum time to adjust?

And remember whatever you think of her Mum (I cannot stand my Stepchildrens Mum) she still has feelings to consider.

Good luck and hope it all goes ok,

Go and see a solicitor. When i was 9 and my sis 12. we stayed with our dad for six weeks holiday. we did not want to leave so he saw a solicitor, who spoke to us together and apart to determine where we wanted to be. At that age we were considered old enough to know our own minds..(and that was nearly 15yrs ago) so your dd should be treated the same. Get someone legal asap and dont send her back..(ask solicitor first)...hth..

You need to see a solicitor to find otu what you can do.

Every ones needs are different.

At 13 her wishes would be taken into account by the court.

emma

hiya, my oh's 13 yr old daughter has stayed with us for 3 weeks and doesnt want to go home.She stayed last year and was due to move here but at the last min her mum said no.We all really want this but the mother keeps sayingno n causing loads of rows.I can understand her not wanting to loose her child but this woman really isnt like this! does the child have the right to make her own decisions?and how would we go about it ? advice needed asap as she is due home tomorrow x