Thanks for your replies

was both great advice i hope he will turn around, he really is a good boyfriend his not a total idiot lol, he will never be nasty to me about it i just dont want him to be happy ..like meeee

i think i will talk to him about it cos to be honest i havnt iv just been a bit moody with him so he has no idea lol.

both your like babies are gooorjus

thank yoou xx

Hey, i couldn't just pass on by without replying! I pretty much went through the same as you!! When i was pregnant with my little girl (who's now 15 months old) my boyfriend was pretty much like you're describing your's to be. We'd only been together 2 years at the time and she was not planned either!! He was very shocked and worried (mainly about money issues as we were both students at the time) and quite scared to be honest. He didn't think he was old enough to be a dad (21) He eventually came round to the idea though and was even better when we went for the first scan. He thought it was amazing to see this living baby on the screen, knowing it was growing inside me! However, it wasn't long after this that he went back to acting like you explained. I asked him why he was acting the way he was, and why he didn't seem as excited as i was and he said, he couldn't relate to the baby. She didn't feel real, because he wasn't feeling anything i was (kicks, hiccups etc) and he felt i had a better bond with the baby. He didn't know how i was feeling and didn't know how to make things better (but he tried eventually with chicken soup and cups of tea, etc!) He did carry on this way, and he admittedly missed a few midwife appointments here and there, but when the baby was moving about he would sit and listen or put his hand on my belly. I think what i'm trying to explain, is that he didn't feel like the baby was real (until later on) because he couldn't feel her like i could, and obviously he couldn't see her! He can't compare to how you will be feeling, he won't know how to help. Maybe you should go along to some classes together when you're a bit further on (not sure when they start!!)
Anyway, my partner was scared of seeing her being delivered too (but he watched!!) and he even cut the cord when she was born, and he had said he wouldn't!!! Now he is the best dad ever to her, and she is such a little daddy's girl! I hope your partner warms up to the idea of being a daddy as much as mine has!! I guess the only other explanantion is; he's a man, not as good as us women are they!!!
Don't know if this has really helped, but good Luck with your pregnancy anyway!!
Kat xx

hiya, i know its hard atm but try not let it bother u too much for now or u wil feel worse. my bf didnt things like that too and didnt understand some things i went thru. if it carrys on then sit him down and tel him exacly how u feel and see what he duz. if u already have and hes carrying on then u need to make a decision coz u cnt be like this thru the whole pregnancy. hes goin thru loadza emotions and its probly his way of dealing with things so tryyy be patient n b the bigga person. my babys 3months old now and my bf stil dont understand how i feel sometimes coz he works and im at home with my little one. like i said, tell him how u feel and go from there =] x

our baby wasnt planned but im happy... my bf was of course shocked  and a little worried at first but then come round to it and go excited a bit, and now he just keeps changing 1 min his excited, the next his not. he tells me its ok we'll be fine, but tell shis friends he doesnt no what to do and all this. his a great boyf and we have been together 4 years. and i no for a fact he would never leave me because of the baby. but im worried he will carry on like this through the hole of it,  he never asks how i am,  i went and saw the midwife for first time today and he didnt remember,  the other day i felt really sick and we was in the town and i said i need to sit down i dont feel well and he moaned saying ooh cant we just look around and i said its not my fault im sick and his just like ino its not but every time we go out u feel ill and we cant do nothing, i was so annoyed but he dont seem to understand and wondered why i was giving him silent treatment, then another time i nearly fainted cos i just went soo light headed and he didnt really care was just liek u orite now? ok lets go. aaarghh!!! idiot, please tell me he will get better lol. im only 10 weeks