1:64 risk of downs- detailed scan vs amnio
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- 1:64 risk of downs- detailed scan vs amnio
4/10/08 12:46
4/10/08 11:51
Marguarited - CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
I have been regularly wondering about you and hoping you were ok - Im sure James is gorgeous and hope your all settling down to family life x
I want my baby now!!!!!
Kate xxxxx
4/10/08 09:40
karen she sound gorgeous and you sound like a proud mummy. I Help out at riding for the disbaled and all the kiddies with downs ( and one adult ) are fantastic the most helpful, kind loving people i have even had the chance to meet.
Im sorry you are all going through what you are going through and i hope you all make the right decisions for you.
xx
4/10/08 09:07
Hi
havent posted for awhile, but wanted to pass on my news.
James was bornon wednesday weighing 6lb 40z and he is gorgeous. For those new to this forum my husband had a vasectomy 7ish years ago which had rejoined. Our risk for Downs was 1:2
We received the confirmation from the blood test yesterday although we already new that James has Down.
Just wanted to say to everyone who is trying to make the decision about amnio etc that my thoughts are with you and what ever decision you make will be the right one for you. x
3/10/08 23:16
moira wat makes u think that ppl that have a child with ds would not like another with ds?? not one have said that!
3/10/08 18:21
This is for Louise or others in the awful situation of deciding whether to undergo tests.
The professor is talking on it and I think he devised the nuchal scan actually.
I hope we are allowed to post links.
http://link.brightcove.com/services/link/bcpid1184614595/bctid1797742802
3/10/08 18:01
All babies are gorgeous. Whether with downs or not. I hope we can celebrate all children.
Ive noticed that most women with downs when pregnant again have tests as they do not want another baby with downs. To me that says it all and shows how difficult it all is. Its easy to paint a rosy picture and I feel it makes women feel bad who have decided to terminate.Then they go on a guilt trip and I dont think its fair.
3/10/08 17:53
I have pm'd you Sunflower x
Thanks everyone, I think Amy is gorgeous but then I would say that wouldn't I?! Your babies are beautiful too xxx
3/10/08 17:49
Sunflower
You were in an awful position. Mums are only given a short time to make a decision after the tests. To find out all the info about bringing up a baby with downs is impossible in a few weeks.Especially when the state of mind is not good. You really need to experience seeing a family and meeting children with downs.
As 95% of women diagnosed with babies with downs decide to terminate then I suppose the health professionals conclude that most women are negative. That is probably where that attitute comes from.
I know the midwife said when the child is born you don’t know how severe the handicap is,which frightened me. How can you prepare for that!
with regards the learning disability being 6-8. I dont know where I read that. I havent heard of anybody going to uni or taking GCSE’s with downs. I think that must be rare. They can go to mainstream school as schools are not allowed to discriminate against people with learning disabilities or autism.
I did read that 2 people with downs have had children and that was on the official site.
I think it would be good to start a new thread or develop a forum where these issues can be discussed. I thought that was more appropriate as at the time people were upset about the tests.Then being made to feel guilty cos they were worried about their baby having downs. Especially someone being told its not the end of the world which I thought was extremely insensitive. We are not all the same,It might be the end of the world to someone.
3/10/08 17:36
I think I've got some photo's on here now but not sure if I've done it right xxx
3/10/08 16:36
oh dear,,, andrea huni have u thought of councilling?... do u tell ur feelings 2 ur partner?.. i really feel sorry 4 u in my heart xxx
3/10/08 16:32
Amy is really really beautiful.. I cried and cried when I saw her.. it sounds so stupid and pathetic.. but she is just a baby .. a beautiful little girl, which the same hopes and dreams as the rest of us..just wanting her mummy and daddy to care for her... I know it must be really difficult.. a life change for many.. when things dont quite turn out as you thought they would.. but we adjust dont we....I have two strapping sons.. if something should happen to one of them (god forbid..) I would not just give up.. Im a fighter and I would do everything I could to help and give them quality of life... Having a child with downs is just a slightly different track to others, but it still runs parallel... with love and care and attention and a little more patient, these children lead happy lives... I feel like getting in touch with the hospital and putting my name forward as a view point for anyone who is thinking of having a termination... I know it cant be easy.. but all I had in my mind was disabled...mentally unable, ugly....fat, lolling tongue.. I know this is going to hurt you, but thats the picture you get.. and yet when I had my daughter.. she was mine and she was beautiful as your little ones are... you are helping me so much.. but my goodness.. have I cried.... and do I regret my decision....more so everyday... I have this great tight ball of love to give and it hurts like hell.. the problem is.. only she can have it.. and shes not here any more...
I am sorry ladies for going on, but these thoughts are with me more andmore....
xx
3/10/08 15:08
Edger, Amy is gorgeous, I love the picture of her sitting in the washing basket she looks really cute xxx
3/10/08 15:03
Andrea, I'm glad to hear that you are getting some help and I can certainly offer you friendship. To me it sounds like you weren;t given enough info before you made your decision. I've heard of f different people when they got amnio results back that showed their baby had downs, that the professionals were very negative and almost assumed that they would want to terminate. This is so wrong as who are they to offer advice really, they probably haven;t got a child with downs so all they know is what is written in books etc and that is all very out dated. One lady was even offered at termination at 36 weeks!! The best people to offer advice on what it is like to raise a child with downs is parents that have actually raised them. As I;ve said I;m pg again and I had to go for an early scan due to a small bleed. The sonographer had obviously noticed that George had downs and said to us ' obviously you;ll be wanted tests with this baby, did you have any when you were having your son?' I was quite shocked that she automatically assumed we would want tests and we've actually decided not to have any. I told her I;d only had the blood tests with George and they were 1 in 954 for downs, her reply was 'well someone has to be that 'unlucky' one'. I said no not unlucky. I;ve gone off track a bit there but just pointing out that so many proffessionals have a negative attitude to downs which obviously isn;t going to help expectant parents come to a decision. Anyway I'll try and get some pictures on my profile. Speak to you soon and remember you can alway pm and if you want to start a new thread I;ll reply to you on there xxxx
ps, Moira, I think that bit about IQ levels maybe a bit innacurate. People with downs can go to mainstream secondary school, take GCSE's, some even go to uni and learn to drive xxx
3/10/08 14:49
edger amy is adorable xxx
3/10/08 14:41
mine too... gosh i really would love to give u a massive hug right now andrea x
3/10/08 13:23
Andrea, please feel free to have a look at my pics, there are plenty on my profile (although not so many up to date ones as Bounty says they're too big and i'm cr@p at making them smaller
).I will pm you later when I have more time (am just about to give dd dinner). You sound like you need to talk and need a friend x
3/10/08 12:27
hi
i would really love it if you could post some photographs of your babies.. the ones who do have downs... i cant seem to get over this at all, i cant change anything that i have done but i am becoming a little obsessed at wanting more information...i dont know.. maybe even though i am getting on a bit (i am 45....) i may go ahead and try again, people older than me have had children.. and i still feel i have one in me somewhere... this time i probably would not have any tests....i dont want to put a rosy view on the fact that .. its ok to have a child with downs.. but....the hell i am going through now is not worth it....this is going to sound really daft, but shortly after i got pregnant i bought a little dog... a lhasa apso.. i have always had lhasas, but i got a b*** in stead of a dog... needless to say she has been a godsend and i absolutely adore her.. its a bit worrying really as she has become my surrogate baby....but i look at her and i think would i love her if she was any different than she is now.. say if she became ill... this is pathetic really as we are talking about a dog here and not a child....but its the only way i can put it into perspective.. i have no contact what soever with babies.. i hve not held a baby in my arm for years and years, but when i had daisy.. i almost willed her to wake up, i diddnt care that something was wrong.. i just wanted her to wake and i would sort it out... i am having help .. i do talk to people.. my life is going on..... i just want people to think very carefully before they make the decision to terminate, because some times when you are faced with the reality.. like having the baby and then finding out that he/she has downs is different all together.... i dont know.. i feel so confused with everything at the moment... i only know in order to help me go forward i need information and help and some friendship with people who have children with downs... so maybe we should start a new thread and leave this as it was....
please post back...
xx
3/10/08 11:31
didnt know u were pg again loui.. goodluck huni x
3/10/08 09:53
Louise I dont think I could go through an amnio again. I had it on Monday and Im ok and its Friday now. Im an anxious person anyway and this was frightening. I dont know if Ive been brave or stupid. They had just put the worry in my head and I was so depressed and stressed that I felt I couldnt carry on like this for 5 months. If I had had a mc through the amnio I would have hated myself for life.It's terrible what is happening. I also dont believe these tests have any great value from reading what women are saying. They are hailing these tests as a good screening tool. They are not. They are basing it on age really. If 95% of women are said to be high risk and then their babies are healthy then the tests arent working.It seems to be guesswork.
I began thinking I would rather just go ahead and have a baby with downs than risk losing a healthy baby. That is exactly what Professor Nicolaides and his wife said when they had that dilemma. Ironically they did not have an amnio!!!
I also am not negative about people with downs. They are as adorable as any other child,possibly more in fact to be honest. I just think that its not all rosy as is being portrayed by some mothers and many of the mothers who have babies with downs have not been through the process of that child growing up.They do have heart problems and other physical problems ,its not just all about a learning disability. I did read that the IQ never goes beyond a child of 6-8.
I worked with a man with downs and he was a real character. I would love that baby just like any other and that is the problem. I am in recovery from a mental health disorder and if I found I couldnt cope then they might take that child away and I would never get over it.
Even if the test results came back as downs I dont know if I could have gone through a termination at a late stage.
huge congratulations xxx enjoy him xxx