How would u feel if ur child was in a car crash an not strapped in a car seat?  surley its ur child u should provide a car seat?  i now have 2 grand kids an if i have them id expect to b provided with a seat unless i already had 1 fitted in car.

as 4 suggesting they use buses thats bit unfair, why dont u leave them ur car an u go work on the bus  or offer them the money so they can trail round an get a seat an it wont b wasting ur time hence to say its 4 ur child benefit??

Hi, I'm lucky, my car seat fits inside my Dad's car so all I have is the hassle of swapping it from car to car in the morning and evening.  I would definately buy him one if it didn't.  He is 65, giving me days of free child care and has his own life.   Also ,although he has toys at his house, it is nowhere near the amount I have at home and dd does get bored if she has to stay at home all day.  Dad and dd have a routine for their days together which includes doing his Tesco shop, hence the need for a car.  However, if you are strapped for cash, why not offer to go halves?

My parents looked after dd1 before I went on maternity leave and will be having the 2 of them from Sept 2.1/2 days a week.  We pay them a small amount and buy the things that they need - this has included a car seat.  It is much cheaper than nursery and dd1 has a fantastic relationship with them and they have taken her to lots of places when they have her.

If your inlaws are caring for your child so that u cam go to work then why should they pay out for the things she needs to care for her? Thats your job if you want her to go there.

sorry just read all the posts and realised car swap has been suggested that will teach me not to try and read bounty whilst being on the phone and holding little one x

can you not swap cars on the days you MIL has little one??

Bella Louise, I totally agree with you, it sounds like your MIL is just trying to be awkward to me!

2 days out of 7 without s car is minimal, and she is having the honour of spending all that time with her grandchild, an honour many who live far away from grandkids would pay money to have!

My son is 7 mths and I don't drive, so only have car when dh home. Somehow i seem to manage 5 days a week without one The bus is cheaper than the car anyhow now petrols so expensive and most days we go for long walks to the park or beach now weathers better and take a picnic. You do not need a car!!

My parents live away and would give anything to have Andrew for a couple days, and belive me, they would buy the carseat themselves if it bothered them, which it wouldn't. My MIL would prob be like yours Luckily she doesn't live near either, and I'm not planning to go back to work, but i'd rather pay someone than leave Andrew with her if she's gonna be like that! Totally unnecessary

I agree with the other posters, sorry hun but I think it is you that is being a little unreasonable. My mum is going to have my son when I go back to work 2 days a weeks in June, she doesn't drive but if she did I would definitely agree to buy a car seat for her car, it would be the least I could do for her as I am so grateful to her for looking after my son, it isn't about the money to me, I do not want to leave my son with complete strangers and I am eternally grateful to my mum for what she is going to do for my son. I didn't expect it of her but she offered, he's not her responsibility after all he is mine and I think any grandparents that do this for their grandchildren are very very special indeed, after all they have raised their children and sure they enjoy being with the little ones but it's not all roses as we mothers all know.

You say it is only two days but 2 days every week for the forseeable future is actually quite a responsibility. I don't think you really understand just how lucky you are. Think of all the mums out there that have to leave their children with people they don't know. Your child is going to be benefit hugely from this.

The solution I think is to offer to pay for the car seat and go with your MIL in the car so you can get one that fits. Good luck.

To be honest I think it is totally reasonable for your inlaws to be able to go out with your lo in their car if they wish, they are looking after your lo without charge and saving you a  fortune in childcare fees. Personally I would either do as a previous poster suggests and sort insurance out and offer to swop cars, or ask them to take their car to mothercare and have one fitted and say you'll pay for it. They may have funny shaped seats but there will be car seats to fit. Might not be what you want to hear but I'm with your pil on this. sorry !

Ps look at it this way, they obviously dont want to rely on the  bus with your lo or they would already do so and if they cant go out then this will limit what they do with your child. Getting them a car seat may mean you lo gets trips out which they otherwise wouldn't have and the cost of a car seat is probably equivalent to around 3/4 days nursery care not that much when you think how much you're saving by them having them.

I completely agree with sorting out your car insurance and letting your inlaws have your car with the fitted seat and you take theirs for work..

Lets remember you are so lucky getting free childcare...I wish I did!!!

I would buy a car seat for my inlaws for a couple of hundred pounds if it would save me the fortune in childcare costs!!

Unfortunately at the moment mine work so don't have set days they can have my dd...4 days work costs me £126 a week...I would prefer to buy a car seat (£240 for Honda CRV..fitted) and know she was with her grandparents that take her everywhere and make alot of fuss over her and she comes home happy.

It is only 2 days, and you are in a better position then most working mums. What car do they have????

I wouldn't expect my inlaws to look for car seats, as a parent it is my responsibility, I would take the time out and source it, fit it, and pay for it...especially as it is free childcare, and you go to work knowing you have done your bit to ensure your childs safety. You can't expect them to sit in all day...they have a life too.

i can see both sides of this but i agree with your inlaws on the car seat issue but they should buy it if its gonna make their life easier

i know all to well what a struggle it is to use a bus as when i had my section i had to use public transport and i really missed my car and the freedom that came with it. on 2 occasions i was waiting for a bus and when it came all the buggy zones were full and i was told i'd have to wait for the next bus, i wasn't very happy

is it an option that on the days you work, they have your car with the seat and you have theirs??

believe me, i'm not one for inlaws but i think there has to be a compromise here???

good luck!!!

if they've got a car with unusual shaped seats they really need to go shopping for sears with the car so they car try seats in it iyswim - I'm sure you know toysrus & mothercare etc are usually really helpful about this. Perhaps a compromise would be that they go & find a seat that will fit & you'll offer to pay for it. If so do agree first what's a reasonable amount! Or agree that you'll pay a certain amount towards it. This way you don't waste the time looking for it (& this is precious when you're both working) or waste money getting something that doesn't fit & if they really want the seat they'll have to do something about it.

hope this helps!

I work 2 days a week and my MIL looks after my dd who is 18 months old. We have recently bought a new car seat for dd which fits in mine and my hubbys car but not my in-laws. They are really playing up about this and demanding we buy another just for their car. In our defence we've visited Halfords and the manager there said that we'd have difficulty finding one that fits their car as the back seats are a weird shape. We told my MIL this but I don't think she believes us. She keeps going on about how not having a car seat is frustrating as they can't go anywhere. However, my in-laws are both over 60 and I don't see why they can't travel on the bus as they and my daughter can travel for free.

Me and my hubby are always strapped for time as both of us work, we have little time together and so have not been around other car seat shops to look for something for their car as we just  have so many other things to do. Is it unreasonable of me to think that she only looks after dd 2 days a week and therefore has 5 days of the week to herself to go whereever she wants in the car. Why does she have to go out in the car the 2 days she has dd?

This is not the first time my in laws have demanded we buy something for dd to make their lives easier and I'm sure it won't be the last. I wish I could afford alternative chilcare as the inlaws occasionaly mention how much money they're saving us and so we feel guilty when we don't meet their demands.