The whole santa thing aside, it is YOUR house, YOUR children so YOUR way! My mil is very set in her ways and wants everyone to house on xmas, sees her hubbys side day after, someone else day after etc and wont budge to see us and ds so we don't see her till way after xmas when she's finished her 'gatherings' and she NEVER gives us presents b4 we see her so we have them a week late (i however give them all og theirs b4 xmas when we see them. However when los old enough to want his pressies xmas morn dh will explain they need to have his ready or its unfair!

I always make sure everyone has their pressie b4 xmas to open on the xmas day, esp the kids, she's hardly being fair!

surley a bit pointless worrying about this now, by the time he is 7 he probably wont believe in santa anyway, last xmas i knew my ds was only pretending to believe so he didnt hurt my feelings, lol. he was 7 in the february.

but then surely letting them get there own way is showing them if they stamp their feet like a child then they win. They are your kids not theirs, they need to understand that and respect you as their mother. What you say goes.

I had just the same thing with my mil. After it causing an upset for several years I eventually realised that they were not going to change so it was just better to get on with it rather then go through the upset of it each year. Its hard because you want to carry on like it was when you were little but they obviously don't do it like that. Its hard but I'd try and let it go if I were you as it will just wind you up otherwise.

I think you need to sort it out with your DH.

It seems your following your childhood tradition of christmas eve which is the norm in a lot of european countries(France inc.) but the UK it is usually Christmas day.

I think you both need to agree and start your own tradition.

Maybe it would be nice to let your mum and MIL bring a present each max to watch them open. It can be a last min bought Christmas eve present that couldn't get to santa in time. That way every one gets the same treatment.

Emma

x-mas eve

i give out all the gifts we have bought for people on xmas eve

Some things come from Santa the rest come from who ever and they arrive with the person who bought them at our house.

The only reason mine have all their presents Christmas morning is that every one in England sends them to Santa to deliver in France!

I think you need to let the people who bought the presents give them. Do you give your inlaws their presents on Christmas day or christmas eve?

Emma

I think thats a good idea... everyone wins, but will the kids be able to wait that long? I know I wouldnt even at my age lol!!!

i understand now why you want  santa to bring them all but could you not say that santa brings them but they have to open them when nanny  is there as nanny bought them for santa to check

But children talk... esp when they go to school. Isn't telling children different things going to make it all confusing?

No he knows the presents are from nanny but he thinks that nanny sends the presents to santa to make sure they are the correct presents.

Mil was the one who told him she had to send them to santa for him to check cause ds found some presents at her house so she made excuse as to why he could not have them straight away

i agree with that , we always had pressys from santa when we woke up and anyone else bring their s in afternoon etc so they could see them open them. it is only right if they have bought them that they would like to see their faces when they open them

I  agree  with  Lizzi. if  you are  wanting to  tell  the  children  teh  presents  are  from  santa  thats not  very  fair  as they  have  spent  timepicking  presents  for  the kids from them..  whatwill happen when they are older and dont belive will u say they r from u

I'm a bit confused: you want your children to belive that the presents that their grandparents are buying them are actually from santa ?  Please correct me if I have misunderstood.  If that's the way you want it then they should respect you for it.  However, I havent heard of it done like that before.

We always had pressies from santa ( to open on Christmas morning ) and also presents from my grandparents.  We will carry on the same tradition with LO, except my mil didn't get her anything at all last Christmas.

I think that she should respect that you are the childrens mother and do as you ask!

I am going to sit on the fence with this one I think! 

I agree with you that I would prefer to do it your way and have all the presents there as if Santa brought them.  I know my mum would do it this way as she did this year, but I know mil won't as she brought presents down on xmas day this year and wanted to watch lo open them. 

My dd is only 1 so doesn't matter at the mo, but I think I will continue to let my mil have the presents and we will probably be making up some rubbish about santa taking some there.  It won't be ideal but I have enough problems with my mil without starting another disagreement with her!!

I think I'm trying to say, just grin and bear it, but I know that's sometimes easier said than done!!!

Hi,

I know its early but i have only just joined and would like advice.

My ds is 6 this year and has had 5 christmas, every year we have the same arguement with my mil, she wants to bring the presents down xmas day and i want the xmas eve, when i was little all our presents were at my house xmas eve as santa brought then, but mil wants to bring then xmas day so she can see ds and dd open them it would not be so bad if she only bought then a few presents each but as she gets them loads(spent £200 each on them last year she insits on telling me).

Dh ends up having hugh arguments with her every year about it, im not sure he agrees with me as all his presents came xmas day except the ones from his parents but he stands by what i want anyway.

She still ends up bring a few xmas day anyway as she said she forgot all about them (0this happens every year).

Is there anything we can do about it without cause hugh arguments. just wish she would do what i want. My mam has always brought the xmas gifts to us xmas eve as she always did it that way but if she didn't one year she would be told the same a mil.

The reason i want them there is my dc are still young and i want them to believe santa brought the presents, she says well santa could have dropped some at her house, but im just not happy with that

any advice?