I got on ok with mine untill I had my son (now 7) he was born the night b4 a family wedding but they still went and did not see their sons 1st child untill he was 2 days old. I had twins nov 06 and she was in with dh by 4 pm and saw them b4 me as I was still recovering. This time last year everything broke down over something my ds had done while playing in the street and I was virtually called a bad mother. I refused to go to their house or even answer the phone. She has verbally attacked us while we have been shopping and when we brought up the fact that she didnt give a damn when ds was born she could not remember and then said they left it so long because I had had a c-section but I had one with my twins and she was in like a shot. In her mind she has done nothing wrong even when she arranged with ds to go with dh on xmas day then went to her daughters on the other side of the country on xmas eve. I have not spoken to her since the start of dec and have no intention to as the last thing she said to me was that I would be lucky to keep my dh with my attitude. She used to see kids at least once a week now shes lucky if its once a month.

My parents are the ideal GPs and I'd be lost without them.

My MIL lives on the Algarve - thank goodness.  I've never liked her and things havent improved since LO arrived, in September.  She has been to visit once ( as we only invited her once ).  She now wants us to take LO to see her, but I'm refusing to go.  She made me feel extrememly uncomfortable in my own home.  I dread to think how I'd feel in her home.  She kept telling LO not to look at me and told me that LO is only interested in me as I am the font of her food, and if I wasnt the font of her food then she wouldn't have any need for me.  She told me that I was upsetting LO, by being in the same room as her. In fact, LO was upset coz she wanted me and MIL wouldn't let me have her.

Despite being loaded with money ( ie has an off-shore bank account ) she has never bought anything for LO not even a being born pressie, a Christmas pressie or a 1st visit pressie.  Ok, I went to Mothercare and chose a UV swimsuit and MIL offered to pay for it.  She likes to control people with money and wrote me a cheque, much to my surprise, but then told me that I wasnt allowed to spend any of it on LO.  I wanted to rip the cheque up,as I didn't want her money ....but I put the money into LO's CTF account.

She is incredibley jealous of me and also my mum ( who sees LO nearly everyday ). x

i had same problems,wouldnt leave my side at hospital,smotherd us afterwards,demanded that dd goes down to her house with dp.i said no way!!she went ballistic.then came the taking over-cream off  cakes and trifle at 3m old,giving my lo pizza sauce at 6m(grandad)them constantly putting me down for in my opinion just being a senible parent,ie healthy food,following guidelines and even metting others at groups(yes they even s****d at that)they have 5 other gks whom they rule,always got them overnight,feed them junk,let them run riot.they will never have her on her own.just today she tried to pick up dd to take her to see her friend a few meters away and dd pushed her away and said no(shes 21m)im glad in a way as it means she cant just try to take her away when she feels like it(i know i sound really heartless but shes done so many things i just dont care anymore,i have feelings and i can only take so much)i really want another baby but am scared itl be the same again even though i feel much stronger now.before i got pregnant she was still dominerring but as it was only us two we just let it wash over us.why do they do it? shes moved about an hours drive away now so things are a bit more easier but we still get summoned to go down to see them(whole fam live down there)we usually only visit bdays or if we cant get out of it.if it was her 1st gk id understand but she has another 5...dp does stick by me most of the time and knows what shes like.i guess ive got at least another 30 or so yrs of her lol laughing but not funny x

what is it with mil's?? I don'g get it. I have to say mine is no where near as bad as some of yours but she drove me to nearly having a breakdown by moving in with us for five months! She thinks she knows better than me about everything to do with my girls but does not see it. SHe ruined my time with my first dd and I have not let her do it with the second as we have hardly seen her. I feel mean sometimes but I can't let her ruin this one too! Why can't they accept they have had their children and just enjoy ours without laying a claim on them and assuming they know better? I really hope I am not like it if I become a grandma! 

My MIL made my life hell, when ds was born it was meant to be myself, dh and my mum who had flown from NZ there, and of course her and her hubby turned up. Then when lo was 4 days old that was the start of it 'can you drop him down for the afternoon' at four days old, dont think so! had constant hassle, always having a go at us trying to tell us how to raise our child as they needed to bond with him and they couldnt play with him they way they wanted to in front of us? whats that about? They even did a nursery in their house, which is 6 doors down from mine, no need at all for that. Finally things came to a head and they came to the house and demanded we leave lo with them alone, we said no and they wouldnt accept that. Then MIL decided to put a note through my door saying she isnt coming to our wedding reception or ds 1st birthday. So I have told them that they have officially wiped their hands of our family, which they have as they could of spent plenty of time with myself, dh and son, but no, they wanted to play pretend family. Also, they obtained a copy of his birth certificate and opened him a bank account and didnt tell us, I only found out by chance from bank. Nightmare, as all other grandparents are fine, almost like MIL and her husband (with no children) wanted to pretend ds was theres! Sorry for the rant!! just gets my goat that it wasnt good enough for them to spend time with my whole family.

How did you stop her acting like lo's mother? I try all the time but my oh says im being ignorant and need to grow up! I just dont know how to get my point accross without sounding like im constantly having a go and nagging! x

Hi Sugar

Our mil sounds like the same person lol. I really can sympithes with you I have often thought about not going round anymore but decided against that idea as my oh would let her do what the hell she wanted and between the lot of them they have not got one ounce of sence. She does stuff that drives me insane like letting my dd put her hands right inside her mouth. They also pull there face when we sat out in garden and I cover dd in sunblock every hour or so she is a red head and I just would not risk her burning. I have burnt before and its so painful. Since our huge arguement though I now just say what I think I am not bothered if she does not like it anymore she has never been bothered about upsetting me. She still trys to takeover and act like dd mother sometimes but i just put a stop to it straight away now. We now have baby no2 on the way and there is no way on this earth she is gonna behave how she did last time I just wont put up with it. God sorry that turned into a bit of a rant felt good to write it down though. tc xm

God why do I start!! Pritty much the same. MIL never saw us before lo came along, never had a nice word to say about or too us, yet wants to be at my house everyday. I put a stop to it about 6 weeks ago now. She made me so depressed. I had a really bad labour and wasnt able to hold my baby for a while which I felt delaid bonding with him, but sure enough as soon as I was home she was there ALL THE TIME!! I would get up about 6:30am and she would be round at 7am ( no lie! ) and wouldnt leave until 10pm !! I feel I never truely bonded until about 6 weeks ago, he turns 6months tom!! I will never fogive her for what she put me through. My parnter is more concerned on how she feels and worries when the last time she saw him! I dont go round to there house anymore, I have nothing to say to them, but I let my partner take the lo around.

i hate my mil. i used to like her but since having lo she has turned in to a living nightmare!! she just takes lo when SHE wants comes round all the time. she is always sarcastic towards me and talks down to me. she goes againts all mine an dp morals, she always has to have the last word and be right about everything. she is the cause of most of our arguments. i think she would take over my life if she could! grrrrr

My Mil has driven me insane  since I had my dd trying to take over with everything from what bottles I used and what milk I fed her to how long we had to stay when we visited. She was never really bothered how often she saw us before we had dd but all of a sudden she felt she had a right to have a say in everything and wanted to be at my house everyday(I dont think so). We ended up having a massive arguement at the begining of the year because she felt she had not seen us enough over xmas she said alot of spiteful things  even accusing me of being jealeous of my dd which is far from the truth I went to hell and back to have her my first 2 lo were stillborn I love my dd more than anything in this world. I now absolutley hate going up there I have a list of topics that I am not aloud to talk about including my family. But I make the effort to have a hour or two up there once a week as I dont want my dd to miss out on having 2 sets of gp so I just have to grin and bear it. This is just the tip of the iceberg but I would be here forever if I tried to write everything.

if its not bounty, how would they get the B above their name? not being funny, just curious lol

If you click on the user profile it says the user has been banned. Not sure it is Bounty Admin...

i feel as though they come to see lo and not to see me (thats both sets)

my mum has an opinion on everything and i want to raise him my way so we clash about that.

mil complains to dp all the time about me and not letting her hold him, give bottles etc i asked dp after the 100th time of discussing it whether they would rather i was a rubbish mum who did nothing for him myself!!!!

basically my life would be easier without them around but lo loves them and i want him to have a relationship with them all just maybe not as full on a relationship as they all want - sometimes seems like they think they're his mum/dad not his nan/grandad

my mil has become even more of a cow bag then before!!!!!

Good point Lizzy (or lizzie)! Why have you started a thread Bounty Bev???

I would like to say, my mil has driven me mad since she found out I conceived... She has never cared about her own son, but ever since I was pregnant she has tried to control our lives and thinks we shouldn't have a life that doesn't involve us telling her everything. At first we put it down to excited granny, but one day when I asked for her to ring before she came round for about the tenth time, she turned round to say 'well I'll be more like your mum then'! WTF?????

When lo was only 7days old, she had seen him for five of them. We both have a big families, so loads of peeps wantes to meet him, I feel it effected my bonding because she was always there demanding hugs... When I said this to her she replied 'he is my first grandchild, I can do as I please.....' need I say more?

I will reply to this thread, when I have a bit more time. I'm curious as to why Bounty Admin has started a thread, as I've never seen you start one before ????