Third degree tears
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- Bladder weakness/pelvic floor
- Third degree tears
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31/10/08 19:14
Natnoo- that's great news, bet you feel like a weight has been lifted, especially with your Gp being so understanding.
Abbie, at least you know whats happening now and that there is a reason. I hope that in 3months things have improved for you. I understand that neither option is great especially if you're unsure if you'll want any more children ( who does at 21??). Please let us know how it goes (((hugs))))
M x
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31/10/08 16:25
ive also got an update.
i went to see a consultant and he had a long chat with me about it and done a internal examination and has told me that ive tore straight through my muscle in my bum so thats y i have no control wen going! hes said hes refering me to someone else in 3 months cos aparently it can take up to 6 months to heal, and if it hasnt improved i can either decide to have it operated on, which means i will never be able to give birth naturally again (because it will just tear again next time) or basically put up with it untill i have another and they will operate straight after ( because it will more then likely tear again) so i havent really got anywhere with it as they r both choices i wouldnt like to choose! (he has givening me some tablets in the mean time that stops me from going to the toilet which is causing me to get very bad stomach cramps).
and only being 21 i dont know how many kids im going to end up with, and if i decided to have the op they then only recommend u have 3 c sections! i suppose im just going to see wat they say in 3 months. x
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30/10/08 22:28
ok, an update for you . . . . . .I went to my GP today and told him how unhappy I was with the consultant I saw and advice to wait 6 months etc. I even broke down crying and my GP said he'd be crying too if he were me! He said it was 'unacceptable' that the hospital expected me to wait 6 months and he has, upon my request, referred to see a very good friend of his (Gynae specialist) privately, and I already have an appointment booked for 12th Nov. Even better than that, if this guy reckons I need a specific treatment, I will be able to arrange to have it done on the NHS and still be treated by the same guy! I'm really hopful that I might get thos sorted now. Will of course bore you all with the details when I see him in 2 week! x
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29/10/08 20:12
By the way ladies, I'm sure the bladder weakness ladies don't mind us using this forum but I have suggested to Bounty that they create a "birth trauma" forum where we can recieve support and advice etc. What do you think? Obviously not just for third degree tears, any birth trauma will do) I appreciate it needs to be carefully worded so not to scare new mums to be etc.
If you think it's a good idea, please lend your support on the " Feedback" forum (near the bottom of the forum list) and it's under " Birth Trauma forum please"
Thanks
M x
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29/10/08 20:07
Natnoo
Sorry to hear you've had such a rough time also. I know which numbing gel you mean as I had that. In my experience, it didn't numb anything and is also a passion killer (not that there's been that much passion or action). When I told the consultant it hadn't worked she gave me a look as if she thought I was lying!
Persevere I would say ( not with the gel). Go private if you feel you need to, shout scream, everything. I have told my GP I am considering legal action against my consultant, not for financial reasons, but purely because I know I'd be sent to an independant specialist you know? If he says I need the 4th operation then so be it. I have physio booked for November so we shall see how that goes. I have doubts as I believe it is a ridge of scar tissue that causes the most pain trying to have intercourse.
It's so bloody unfair isn't it? Why should we be "expected" to have a c r a p sex life through incompetence?
All the best for Thursday, let us know how you get on
M x
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29/10/08 17:17
I had a 3rd degree tear with my first and second baby. With my first baby I tore very badly - she weighed 10lb8oz and midwives said she was the size of a 3mth old baby. I didn't even ask how many stitches I had, but it took them almost 2 hrs to sew me up, for which I had gas and air. The community midwives told me the best way to heal the stitches is to do plenty of pelvic floor exercises as they increase the bloodflow around that area and will speed up the healing process. I found it too uncomfortable to do them. It hurt too too much. I found the exercises easier to do whilst laying in the bath, so that's what I done. Water also speeds up the healing process of the stitches, so I laid in a deep bath for an hour, 3 times a day. I was completely healed after about 6wks, but didn't feel right down there for about 4mths.
With my second baby, he was born back to back so I tore badly again. It took about and hour and a half to sew me up, but I wasn't in a great deal of pain. I did the same after as with my first baby, and again, healing was quite quick. Things were back to normal down there after about 2wks.
With my 3rd baby, I did not tear at all, just a small graze that didn't need stitches. I have not had any pelvic floor or bladder problems as yet, but I wouldn't rule out ever getting any probs. The way I see it is I have had to have surgery down there and that must of weakend the area a lot. I pray with this baby (I am 9+1) I don't tear. I still do pelvic floor exercises everyday - in the bath.
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28/10/08 20:20
Thank you so much for taking the time to reply . . . . .I've made an appointment to see my GP again this Thursday AM. My mum is coming with me to make sure I don't forget to say anything! My GP is actually on my side, it was the hospital consultant who let me down. I,m going to ask my GP to refer me to a private consultant and i've heard that any recommended treatment can then be arranged on the NHS if cost is an issue, so i'll see what happens. I'll let you know! You'd think in this day and age where they can do face and arm transplants, they could sort out 'foo-foo's' !! x
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27/10/08 22:04
Natnoo - if I were you I would absolutely opt for a private opinion. I don't think you should have to but I do feel it will help you in you relationship and in how you feel about yourself.
As I wrote earlier on in this thread, I have had some repair surgery but I'm far from happy. I have issues with the way I look down there and would love for a surgeon/doctor or consultant to be totally sympathetic to exactly what it is that bothers me. As it happens I'm in a very loving relationship and I will wait a few yrs before pursuing this again. When I went for my surgery I was adament I would never have another child but I do feel I would love to have one with my partner in the next few yrs. If there had been any chance I would have more kids I would never have had the op in the first place because I know there are issues in childbirth now and may need c-section, but haven't researched this much yet so don't know for definite.
Before having my surgery I did have over 12 months of psycho-sexual counselling at the request of my consultant. He said it was to make sure I was making the right choice and not just suffering with negative thoughts about sex and stuff.
My advice would be to seek other opinions even if it means paying privately, it's got to be worth it for your peace of mind. Do remember though, any examination you undergo is almost always when you're lay flat - this isn;t when we who have given birth and suffered trauma get our pain or insecurities. Mention it so they can see exactly what is bothering you. Hope you find some answers or solutions. x
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27/10/08 10:17
Hi there, i don't know whether i'm pleased or frustrated to read this thread! I'm going through similar things and don't feel like i'm getting anywhere with it, and reading all these posts just makes me feel like I might never get back to normal!
I had a water birth but very poor assistance from midwife who didn't give me any guidance on pushing, breathing or ANYTHING in fact! I tore badly, which they logged as a 2nd degree tear, but on reflection we now think it was 3rd degree. I had torn a vessel which they couldn't stop from bleeding for a long time and, as it was a mid-wife led unit, there are no doctors or surgeons, so they have to deal with the tears/stitching theirselves (as opposed to being taken to theatre to get sorted). Normally they can take you to another hospital to get sorted, but due to staff shortages they didn't have enough staff for someone to accompany me there, hence the 2nd degree rating!
My dd is now 5 months and, i'm beginning to feel very low about how things are 'down there'. My stitches took a long time to dissolve which caused granulation/scar tissue to form round the stitches which is still painful. I tore right along my perineum, and am still experiencing pain when I go to the toilet (front and back). Sometimes I get a shooting/cramping type of pain, and other times it sore and slightly bleeds (bottom). Sorry if TMI.
I get pain if I sit on a hard chair or surface, and theres no way I could ride a bike for instance!
In adition to this, my GP checked me on 2 seperate occasions and confirmed my fears that I had a mild prolapse of the bladder. I was referred to Gynae consultant about 4 weeks ago. I am VERY disappointed at the outcome. I expalined that I am unable to have sex with hubby due to the pain and discomfort it causes, and I described all of the above to her. She had a quick look, told me I don't have a prolapse 'in her opinion, although it's difficult to look', and gave me some gel to numb the area when I want to have sex (which i'm meant to apply 20mins beforehand).Plus the tube of gel is a single use only tube, and i'm meant to keep going back to GP if I want more!! She then just said they'd look again in 6 months!! I can't beleive that I'm meant to continue on in pain like this, not being able to have sex (a gel will NOT help in my opinion!). I kinda felt like I was just being fobbed off, in the hope that I don't bother persuing it in future!! I'm now contemplating seeking a third opinion privately. What would you do??? (sorry for long rant, i'm just so down about it
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26/10/08 19:52
This is the first time that I've been on this thread and I'm glad that I'm not the only one suffering from the birth of their little ones. I had a 3rd degree cut by the midwife as my little was stuck during active labour, he was also slightly back to back and eventually ventosed out. My little one weighed 9lb 12oz and also tore me on the way out. It took 1hr 1/2 to stitch me up. My bladder went into shock and I couldn't wee for 2 days. I felt like my whole insides where falling out. Apparently the extensive bruising I incurred were the worst my midwife had seen in her 30 yr career.
Anyhow, 4 weeks later and feeling like I can only described as either really bad piles (the dr perscribed ornment etc), huge pressure down below and passing lots of blood and clots I was sent to the hospital where the consultant found a blockage over my rectum where I had not been stitched up properly and had bled internally for 4 weeks!! The blockage was drained - thankfully without needing an opertaion.
I went back to the Dr's when me little one was 12 weeks old and asked the dr to check me out as I was still feeling alot of pressure down below and painful sex, I was told that my weewee hole was still slightly swollen.
My little one is now 5 1/2 months and although I don't have any problems with bladder control sex is still painful and I'm wondering now whether to go back to the Dr's and ask to be checked out properly at the hospital. My question is: those who have been being cut/tore and then stitched up, do you have problems with painful sex aswell and if so have you been to the drs and what has happened. I'm tired of being told that "It's early and things will get better" and clearly to me they're not.
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20/10/08 21:08
i was given a physio chart wn i left hospital i had to do 10 a day and build up in the first 6 weeks!! i done exactly wat they said and its done wonders for my bladder etc because its actually my bowels which im finding hard to control and that were my muscles r gone!! cos i was actually cut 4 times before i tore so its was all round my bum thats suffered!
i just hope with time it gets better as i would hate to have a 2nd op and go through pain all over again x
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17/10/08 14:44
That's really given me hope, Cewharton. Your post makes me think that the same might work for me, so I will crack on with the PFEs!!
x
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16/10/08 20:57
Cewharton, thanks for that, I have half thought about going to Drs but again I wouldn't have been able to explain how it felt! I had a 3 rd degree tear even after episiostomy and 64 stitches as I had forceps after my dd got stuck(ugh!!) I will keep on with the pelvic floor excercises and see howI go x
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16/10/08 18:56
I had a 3rd degree tear 11 months ago and felt that i would never be the same again. Things just didn't feel right and trying to explain the feeling i was experiencing was so difficult. I thought my bladder control would never be the same again and then when i started having periods again i was convinced that my tampon was not inserted correctly and might drop out. I was very low as this was not happening to anyone else. I did some research and it looked like pelvic floor excersizes would help. I had been doing these since i was able but only about 50 a day. I now do 300-500 a day and things are back to normal (better even). Good luck at the hospital Abbie & don't forget the PFEs when you feel up to it. -
15/10/08 20:00
Abbie, sorry to hear that an hope it goes ok for you back at the hospital. I totally know where your coming from with only being able to sit half on one side! I had this after the second repair and it was agony. The only comfy position was lying face down on the floor! I also have trouble controlling my bladder though it is usually when I really am ready to go i.e. already in the toilet if that makes any sense. But I will never take for granted being able to sit down properly.
It is still early days for you and it could well be that your muscles will get better with time (though obviously I'm not an expert), fingers crossed for you.
Carrie, good luck for the GP, don't forget your list and Blue Peter drawing! Let us know how you get on
M x
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15/10/08 15:17
ive just come bk from my doctors about it ( as ive been finding it very diff to control going a toilet) and ive been refered bk to hospital. she said all my mucles are gone theres nothing there. x
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15/10/08 09:26
Hiya
It does sound like it could be nerve damage - i think I can imagine the type of pain you're describing, as it sounds similar to what I experienced when I first had sex after the birth. Almost a burning/stretching pain??
Yes I also had an episiotomy and still ended up with a 3rd degree tear. Apart from the first couple of weeks which were pure agony, I've had no real problems since with pain, although I don't feel that things look or feel quite right. I don't think mine could have been as serious as some others' though, as I'm sure it was only around a 20 minute stitch-up job and the guy did it there and then on the delivery bed with local anaesthetic.
x
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14/10/08 19:09
I get the odd shooting pain actually, I wonder what causes it? I have healed well x
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14/10/08 15:06
i also had a 3rd degree tear!!
i was induced 2 weeks early, so she obviously wasnt ready to come out!
after a failed vontoose i had a forceps delivery, was cut 4 times and still tore and she was only 6lbs. i dont know what would of happened if she was any bigger.
i was taken straight to theatre and was being stitched for 3 hours, the doctor done a fantastic job, all the midwives that checked me over the weeks could even fine it and were amazed, the worst part was it actually tore right on to my right bum check so couldnt sit down for about a week had to sit on my left side. they would tell me how many stitches i had they said there was too many to count, my scar now is bout 3inches. but also had the 4 cuts stitched up too, so i felt like i was down by my ankles at one point with the swelling!!
even know the doctor done a great job im still getting problems, and shes 11 weeks now! still get bad shooting pains and cant stay sat down for too long!
i am also finding it very hard to control going to the toilet, wen i need to go i need to go, my muscles arnt strong enough to hold it in! and it very numb down there still. im hoping it will get better, ive been to the doctors and they have told me it cant take up to 6 months to heal.
i just think after being cut 4 times, a tear should of been prevented!
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14/10/08 13:43
I think I must have been quite lucky with mine.
The anethatist couldnt get the spinal in so they tried an epidural but he nicked a vain so they had to do it under local. I was in theatre for 3 hours but I think a lot of that time was when they were trying to do the spinal.
I asked the surgeon how many stitches I would need but he said it was classed as one stitch.
I didnt have any pain from the stitches. Dont get me wrong the area was swollen and bruised and I was careful when I sat down and on the loo etc but overall I didnt find my stitches a problem at all. x
Hiya ladies
No forum for third degree tears and this is the closest! Just wondering if anyone else has had one and what the outcomes were?
I had one and had 37 stitches inside and out. These broke down and became infected in the first two weeks. Had to wait a month till the infection cleared and had another repair under local anaesthetic (external). This repair still wasn't right and had third repair under general anaesthetic. Long story. Basically I think the first repair was messed up. One year on and I'm still not right. I have bladder weakness yes, but also I can't even put a tampon in it's so sore and I had a smear last week and almost hit the roof. I'm finding it difficult to explain to the consultants the sort of pain I'm feeling. It's as if they think I'm making it up and it's in my head. They have given me dilators to try but I keep telling them it's not a muscular pain at all. It feels like there's an open sore at the entrance. Nerve ending damage has been suggested. Anyone else suffered this?
I don't really want a 4th operation but I can't go on like this. I would also like to know if anyone had an episiostomy and STILL tore?
Any experiences/advice gratefully received!
M x