Night from hell
Please be advised that some of the content in this forum may be of an adult nature.
- Forums
- Relationships/sex
- Night from hell
-
6/12/08 15:32
After I had my last Lo my midwife lent me a book to read because I was suffering with pnd (although not on the scale you have described) it was called 'Eyes without sparkle' and is about a woman who suffered pnd but was ultimately diagnosed with puerperal psychosis, it's a very severe form of pnd. Your wife may be suffering with this and if you research it there are some pretty awful stories about women who have gone undiagnosed.
Here's a link, 'link' to the condition but like I said, there's loads more out there...
http://www.postnataldepression.org.uk/site/conditions/psychosis.html
Hope things get sorted for you x
-
6/12/08 11:14
Unfortunatley it isn't that easy to go down the official route when your asian. HOWEVER, I agree action needs to be taken, I wouldn't trust my child with a person with such issues. I'm not sure what relationship you have with your in laws, but surely they want what is best for their grandchild. If you can't work out somethign with them (rather than with your wife ) then you need to go to the police. Atleast you can say you tried to work it out rationally then. And why does she hate you so much? I've heard of failed marriages but this is a whole 'nother level.
-
5/12/08 10:28
Lets hope so ISABEL.
From what Link has said in the past, his wife is a nast peice of work, she has attacked him on many occasions, most of which his dd has been in the room!
I am worried!
-
5/12/08 09:47
Until your in a situation you dont know how you will react or what you would do. I'm sure he wouldn't let anything happen to his daughter.
-
4/12/08 22:56
I can't believe you haven't taken any action.
She has threatened to kill your daughter...I'm pretty sure your life definitely would be hell if that happened.
Tbh I'm speechless how anyone could put themselves before their kid.
-
3/12/08 11:25
It can be a simple case of burying your head in the sand and pretending it's not happeneing.
'That sort of thing won't happen to MY family'...... but it does.
My brother is a Mental Health Nurse, and unfortunatly he sees the effects from these sorts of things every day.
I am hoping that LInk....... does get some balls and wakes up and smells the coffee and sorts it all out before it too late.
You only have to look at the news lately everyday to see the sorts of things that happen to children, and it is the mothers doing it!!!!!
-
3/12/08 11:21
My ex husband was violent and abusive the last straw for me came when he tried to strangle me while i was breast feeding our baby. While we were married he attempted suicide three times,the last time he flipped smashing things up,while i had the kids hid upstairs i phoned the police and ambulance,as he had took pills. He then went onto the mental ward and has been under a physiciatrist (sp) ever since. He isn't allowed to see the children because his behaviour is unpredictable. I feel for you what you are going through and i hope you manage to sort something out,i never left my children alone with my ex as i couldn't trust him,you have to work and you must be worried leaving your little girl. I would make sure someone knows about what your wife has said she will do and her behaviour,there is no way a court would let your daughter stay with her mum when you split up in these circumstances.She clearly needs help,you seem a lovely man and you and your daughter deserve much better. My ex used to be scared stiff at being sectioned and he knew if he tried to hurt me or my kids again i wouldn't hesitate to have him sectioned,my kids come first. Good luck and hugs issy.
-
3/12/08 10:57
wheres your balls? i agree with what the last 3posts, you NEED to do it!!!!!!!!!!!! yes you may be worried what your wife will do after(imo she'll prob thank you) but this is your child not a soap opera. get your finger out your ass and start the process of getting your wife better. soz that sounds harse but i dont want to see your face on the front of notw with a tragic story printed next to it. please start the process today
-
3/12/08 08:04
not to be rude link and i understand that this is difficult but the women is threatening your child's life!!!!!! so what if you get some s*** for it you will feel a lot worse if she takes your daughter's life.
do something about it!! stand up to her and get her sorted out.
-
2/12/08 22:06
I totally read that wrong i thought it said she was in hospital,oh no,link when people are like that they will use everything they can to manipulate so they dont have to face up to what is wrong with them,she needs help.
-
2/12/08 21:18
Link.... do you really see the seriousness here?
Your wife has threatened to take her own life and that of your baby daughters, and you are simply 'stuck between a rock and a hard place'.
I feel so sorry for you in this situation, but you HAVE to do something. I don't want you posting on here in a few weeks when you come home to her having attempted to kill herself!
-
2/12/08 17:21
Hi link,was thinking of you and wondering if you were ok,im glad to hear shes on her way to getting help,its great that you are there for her but at the minute look after you and your little girl,shes in the best place and if she wants the help they offer then great,if not there isnt much more you can do for her.Trust me from experience i spent the last stages of my first pregnancy running after my previous other half back and forth to get help,up until my lo was about a year,and he kept rejecting the help and putting me and my daughter through misery and i missed out on the most important stages of her life because of it.So do what you can but dont exhaust yourself and take care.
-
2/12/08 15:49
Link if she is suffering from a form of depression, which is untreated. It doesn't go away over night and the person recover with out a lot of help.
I have had experience of this. Being worried and doing nothing is not the answer do you really want to come home find her throwing self out of a third floor window??? Possibly with your DD! It is not a nice sight to see some you love do that, even if you do manage to get them back in.
Do what needs to be done stop pussy footing around and speak to her HV about the welfare of your DW and DD! If she is given help now before it gets worse there is a good chance there will be on fall out.
Emma
-
2/12/08 14:30
first things first, well done you for not just turning and running away from it all xxxxxxxmany people would have xx
you'v said that your dw wasnt like this before the birth but was off the rails a bit when younger ? was there a reason for this or was it just brushd away by her parents ? its not always down to being a teenager ............you do need to take action for your self and you dw and dd, pnd can take on many forms and if she has already been on tablets the effects of just not taking them can be .......well it just dosnt bare thinking about everything can explode the smallist thing can seem overbaring, and have her scared terrified to the piont of wanting to try and control everything, the anger and venom she spits at you can also be her deffence, if as you say she looked possesed then we all say things we dont mean when angry never mind when your just not there in your head
please for all your sake see if you can see her doc and explain whats going on and let them tell you what your options are, and maybe have a bag at a friends for you and the baby with things you might need in a hurry but not somewhere she would know as at the end of the day her biggest fear could be that your going to leave and take everything she's ever cared about with you
theres so many things that shes doing right now that isnt acceptable and the longer it goes on the more likely it will get worse
if ever you need to talk im always around .....sorry for my terrible spelling
lots of ((((((((hugs)))))))))) and thinking of your parents
-
2/12/08 13:22
No, i've not taken her to hospital. Not really sure what to do. I know what i need to do but i dont know what the consequences will be and the long term fallout. My wife is a very spiteful, very manipulative and convincing woman, so long term she could set out to make my life hell. So i'm stuck between a rock and a hard place
-
1/12/08 11:07
I'm hoping he has been down the hospital getting his Wife assesed!
-
1/12/08 11:03
you still about hun,been thinking about this all wkend. hope you and your dd are ok
-
29/11/08 12:38
Are you still iving with her then??
Just get a doc and police around the house asap. I spoke to my brother this morning, (not specifically about you) and he said that something needs to be done fast.
He said that a threat that serious is not good at all, and he worried for her health.
Unfortunatly my brother had to section his best friend 18 months ago. he did it in her best interests and she know thanks him to peices as it gave her time to get her life back together before she lost her three children forever.
-
29/11/08 11:31
Link, firstly a massive ((((((((HUG))))))), Secondly, if you knew a woman going through this you'd tell her to get the hell out and fast! Please, please get SS to help and get away from her with your dd. If she needs help with pnd then you can maybe take thigs slowly when she improves. Don't keep making excuses for staying if she won't get help, because at the end of the day you'll end up depressed then where will that leave your dd?xx
-
29/11/08 06:51
Link, due to the amount of times people have told you what you can do, you know exactly what to do. Call the police and report it, call social services and then a solicitors, and get an emergency residency order, push for a restraining order and then leave her. In the short term go and stay with friends or relatives, in the long term get emergency housing off the council and then find somewhere to privately rent while you sort out your current housing. Push for her to be sectioned, as shes a danger to herself and others. As her husband, you have the final say on what hapens to her in this situation, and noone else has a say except her gp or social worker, so dont worry about resistance from her parents.
If you don't get your daughter out of this situation, you will be faced with testifying about her death in court, and then you'll hate yourself for failing in your duties as a father as you are now, by leaving her where she is.
So please, even though i know its not easy, and i know it hurts, get her and yourself out of there, before she is murdered as revenge by a woman who hates everything. And if she does that, you will have to shoulder the lions share of the blame. So get it sorted now, while you still can.
Had another horrible night last night. My parents are going to India this Tuesday, flying directly to Mumbai, where the recent terrorist attacks took place. I'm obviously very worried about my parents flying out to the city and the risk of revenge attacks against muslims is now very high. The risk is my parents are in a vulnerable situation. So i wanted to take my daughter around to see my parents at the weekend and it could be the last time my daughter and i see them. However my wife was having none of it. She refused to even discuss, going ballistic, screaming and telling me to get out the room or she will attack me.
After a few minutes of her hysterical screaming and threats, i decided to leave the room. After a few minutes i came back in and she again refused to let me take my daughter around. she then started saying she hopes my parents are shot dead or blown up by the terrorists and if it happens, she'll be dancing with joy. She then set about tell me how i'm not a man, i'm weak, a sh!t father. Tells me i'm crap in bed (again), she hates a lot about me, says i'm a looser because i dont have a huge salary (even though i'm on a decent wage) says she hates my family, started insulting my sister, my little neices (they are 6 and
, just vile disgusting behaviour.
A friend of mine commit suicide last week and she says she wishes i joined him. She then started talking about killing herself and taking my daughter with her so that my family couldnt see her. Then says if she is still alive, she will turn my daughter against me so my daughter wont wanna see her.
This sh!t is really starting to get me down and i'm losing interest in everything now. My morale and self esteem are at an all time low and i just can't see any way out of this hell.
Sorry for the rant, just had to get it off my chest.